Top 9 Hints You Chose the Wrong Game Group
All gamers have that moment the first time you walk into a new gaming group. Some feel nervous, others
The Odd Gamer Out
take charge and tread with no fear. Regardless of which type you are, let these helpful hints guide you in making the decision to come back for a second session.
As to why there are only 9, honestly I could not think of anything clever for #10. Besides, everybody does 10. I want to be original.
With no further ado, here is my top 9 list of hints you chose the wrong game group.
9. “Our fighter is a pacifist.”
8. The other players fear girls because they have “cooties.”
6. DM states, “I have all the rules memorized. We do not use books.”
5. “Miniatures are not necessary for 4th Edition.”
4. You play in a dark basement on an old autopsy table and there is a drain in the floor to catch…fluids.
3. The campaign is cross-genre, Cthulhu and Yaoi.
2. Huzzah! We killed the dragon. Time for a group snuggle!
1. The rulebook was written by Jack Chick.
Feel free to add your own thoughts in the comments.
Trask, The Last Tyromancer
About the Author: Trask is a long-time gamer, world traveler and history buff. He hopes that his scribblings will both inform and advance gaming as a hobby.
Umm…miniatures AREN’T necessary in 4e…been playing without them with no problems since it came out…
Yeah, just like you don’t need anaesthetic when having a root canal performed.
It’s not necessary, but it sure does make things go easier.
The anesthetic analogy doesn’t really work out, though I’ll admit that having miniatures is helpful, but not specifically for 4e. Any game where you need to keep track of multiple creatures in varying positions over a long time period tends towards benefiting from miniatures.
That said, I don’t think that they add THAT much to 4e, aside from organizational assistance.
I don’t want to know how number three got on this list. That is just disturbing.
Not trying to fan any flames here, but I believe D&D 4e is foremost a tactical minis game. Sure you -could- gloss over things in combat.
But to implement the rules in all there glory by trying to visualize four or more PCs moving, shifting, deploying area bursts, blasts, area effects, flanking, pushing and marking a half a dozen or more opponents all in your head seems like a recipe for a headache. For which the anesthetic analogy is very relevent.
Now add the additional detail that the players of those PCs all have the exact same visualization in their head. I believe it is more than organizational assistance, it is essential.
And I am using the term minis in a broad sense, as in anything you need to use to visually track game entities (chits, cardboard standups, dots on a grid, etc.).
Somehow, even before I got to the comments, I knew #5 would be contentious.
Remarkable. I post a feeble attempt at humor that is only slightly witty at best and no one attacks my poor writing skills. Instead a throw-away line about not using miniatures with 4th Edition draws more comments!
For the record, I am aware that miniatures are not required for 4th Edition, but in my opinion only a table of savants have the memory skills necessary to actually play the rules “as written” in this manner.
Finally, I want to make it clear for those in the cheap seats that this post is under the “humor” category. Using it as a basis for a rational discussion about game rules is like saying a late-night comedian’s monologue is thoughtful political discourse.
Trask, The Last Tyromancer
Hate to break it to you man, but half the country thinks that comedian’s give thoughtful political insight.
From personal experience, #10: the smell of burning pistachios.
Sorry, my URL was wrong that time; it’s what you get when you’re wrestling three cats to get to the keyboard.
You walk in and the players have made the fighter cry and the GM is popping excedrine migraine like it’s candy. Unfortunate true story…
# 6 could be a good thing.